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"Why do I lead?" #SAVMP part1

 As part of the School Admin Virtual Mentor Program, this question was posed as an opportunity for introspection. I had a knee jerk answer, but giving myself time to contemplate the question has provided me with insight that i am happy to share.

 My first initial thought was "because no one else will". It is easy to think one's self noble and taking up the standard and leading the charge because you see weakness or lack of presence of someone providing the leadership you are demanding like a petulant child.
 Life is not so black and white. The shades of grey and granularity that influence situations and perspectives that need to be understood that create the current climate in a single school could be beyond count, so carry that out into the greater world and even our own personal lives and it would be impressive if anyone could even attempt to understand the factors that affect a single decision in an organization's leadership.
 "Ogres are like onions..." I think of that line from Shrek and often hold it's truth in mind through my various interactions with people.
 To put it simply, my reason for leading is far less noble. I have an agenda.
 It is not as easy to define as "get the school to a 1:1 device level of technology integration", "reduce paper use" or "find ways to prohibit sewage runoff into our local drinking water". What i'm shooting for is a more ambiguous agenda of making all those i interact with, just a little bit better.
 This sounds silly to some people i've told it to, but asking myself during every interaction "what can i do to help this person be a little bit better?" has helped me rethink what i'm bringing to the table and what tools i need to be of service to others. I don't always lead by example, but I'm willing to try to be on the front line and help to the best of my ability to tow the line.
 I choose to lead because if i'm not willing to put myself out there, how can i ask others to. I'm willing to be the first to stick their neck out to risk change and also willing to be the bad guy and take the blame to provide cover so that the others have the safety they need to risk changing a little in order to move forward and upward.
 A phrase i heard recently that i enjoyed was "let's hold them up while we nudge them forward" and i intend to keep trying to do so in the service of others.

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